Marriage/Remarriage

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Before and After the Wedding Night by Grace H. Ketterman, M.D. In her introduction Dr. Ketterman states that this book "will guide you who are new to the adventure of exploring intimacy in marriage to a straight and true course. It is meant to give you the tools with which to carve out your special work of art."
    Drawing upon her professional expertise as a Christian psychiatrist, Dr. Ketterman frankly and sensitively addresses various aspects of the marriage relationship: the physical, spiritual, emotional, and social. She offers a wealth of proven, easy-to-follow suggestions that should help to establish a healthy and solid marriage.
    She offers help and advice on: sexuality, jealousy and inferiority feelings, setting priorities, spiritual bonding, effective communications, congeniality, personality differences, meeting each other's needs, trust and commitment. This book has 155 pages and was published in 1984 by Revell for $8.95 (hard).

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Before the Ring by William L. Coleman. This is a book filled with issues and questions that need to be discussed before making the decision to marry. According to the author, these are the issues that young couples to stumble over most often.
    The book is divided into twenty chapters which represent the major issues that need to be discussed. Some of these titles are: So What's the Hurry?, No More Silly Games, Going with a Perfectionist, Someone to Lean On, Life in the Gender Blender, Love on the Rebound, Quick to Forgive, Guidelines for Sex, One in the Spirit, Laughing Together, Respect for Time and Space and Faithful and Committed. Each chapter ends with a set of sample questions designed to promote discussion and understanding on that particular issue.
    From Discovery House Publishers (Grand Rapids, MI), this book was first published in 1991 with the revised and expanded version of 174 pages published in 1998. Price: $9.99 (trade cover).

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Before the Wedding by Michael E. Cavanagh. This book, subtitled, Look Before You Leap, points out the important areas of study that need to be done before one gets married. The author, a pastoral consultant, bases his book on six assumptions about how to have a successful marriage and provides real-life examples to illustrate each point.
    The ten chapter titles are: Motives for Getting Married, Correct and Faulty Thinking, Growing as an Individual, Growing as as Couple, Parents and Friends, Communication, Sexuality, Parenthood, Cautions and Problems. Each chapter concludes with a set of helpful questions to prompt discussions. Also, the book contains two helpful appendixes: one discusses how couples who are planning a church wedding can get the most out of their marriage preparation visits with their minister and the other explains to ministers how they can be of the greatest help to couples about to be married.
    From Westminster/John Knox Press, this 202-page book was published in 1994 and sold for $14.99 (trade).

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Before You Live Together by David Gudgel. Although the ultimate teaching is a biblical presentation on why it is not a good decision to live together before marriage, the author presents the material in a systematic and compassionately way so that the reader can discover the wise choice for him or herself. This book is an excellent tool for pastors and counselors as well as for individuals.
    Some of the 13 chapter titles include: First Comes Love, then Comes Marriage; Welcome to the Real World; Rehearsal for Marriage; Are You Ready?; What about Sex; 1-800-We-Need-Help; Considering Living Together; Your Most Valuable Asset; Protect Your Soul, View from Above; and The Perfect Wedding.
    Published in 2003 by Regal/Gospel Light (Ventura, CA), this 174-page book sold for $9.99 (hard cover).

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Before You Plan Your Wedding...Plan Your Marriage by Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley. The Smalleys (Greg is the son of Gary) believe that the sooner a couple starts identifying and confronting the challenges that their marriage will face in the long run, the more likely their marriage will weather the storm. They openly and candidly discuss many of their own early conflicts surrounding in-laws, communication and finances and provide you with insights on how to deal with such issues. Their use of Scripture will encourage you to include God in every aspect of your relationship.
    Some of the 11 chapter titles include If We Had Only Known, How to Have a “10” Engagement, God's Purpose for Marriage, Do You Want to Dance?, Personal Responsibility, Heart Talk, Will You Forgive Me?, Teamwork, Putting It All Together, Leaving and Cleaving. Each chapter ends with a some exercises and homework the couple can do to make the most out of the material in that chapter.
    From Howard Books (div. of Simon & Schuster) in 2008, this 322-page book sold for $19.99 (hard cover).

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Believing God for His Best by Bill Thrasher. As the subtitle says, this book is about “How to Marry Contentment and Singleness.” The author shares what he and
his wife, who were both in their 30s when married, learned about how to discern God’s will as they waited on Him and His timing. They also talk about God’s esteem
of singleness, the importance of scriptural convictions, the secret of contentment, and practical aids to living in purity.  
    Some of the 14 chapter titles are: Seeing Singleness from God’s Point of View, Waiting on God for a Mate, Discovering the Secret of Contentment, Pondering a New Direction, Handling Your Passions, and The Secret of Waiting. The book includes two helpful appendices; the first deals with questions to consider regarding your decision to marry and the second offers two sample marriage vows, one for the groom and one for the bride. The book concludes with some study questions based on each chapter in the book.
    From Moody Publishers (Chicago) in 2004, this 153-page book sold for $10.99 99 (trade cover)

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Blessings for Your Marriage by Fiona MacMath. This book is part of the Blessing Series which also includes books for birthdays, graduations, and new babies. Each of these pocket-size books contain 24 pages of a blend of scripture, words of inspiration, thoughtful quotes from classic literature and full-color artwork.
    From Augsburg Publications in 1992, these gift-books sold for $4.50 (hard).

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The Bride’s Handbook by Amy J Tol. As the subtitle says, this is “A Spiritual & Practical Guide for Planning Your Wedding.” This book is more than just a wedding planner; it also presents spiritual reflections on what it means to be a bride of God. Hence, in this book you’ll find everything from planning checklists and cost-cutting tips to scriptural encouragement and applicable stories from brides in the Bible. It will help you become a beautiful bride emotionally and spiritually.
    The 12 chapter titles are: The Engagement, The Groom, The Budget, The Basics, The People, The Flowers, The Photos, The Wedding Attire, The Invitations, The Ceremony, The Reception, and The Gifts. Each chapter includes two parts: planning tools (such as checklists and helpful notes) and spiritual reflections (including sidebars and stories of brides in the Bible).
    From Revell (Grand Rapids, MI) in 2005, this 247-page book sold for $18.99 (trade cover).

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Called Together by Steve and Mary Prokopchak. This is a marriage preparation handbook that offers information on how to strengthen your relationship before and after you say, "I do." It offers biblical counseling, practical worksheets, good advice on important issues and even tips for planning the perfect wedding ceremony.
    From Thomas Nelson Publishers in 1994, this 172-page workbook sold for $12.99 (trade)

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Courtship After Marriage by Zig Zigler. In this book, subtitled, "Romance Can Last a Lifetime," the master motivational teacher/author offers good advice, homespun stories and challenging data in this tribute to the lasting characteristics of marital romance.
    This book would make an ideal gift for newlyweds as suggested by the dedication page in the front of the book. Married couples can also benefit from the insights and by using the 66 question survey to evaluate their marriage and by taking the 20 question "state-of-your-romance" quiz.
    Some of the 12 chapter titles include: Be Happy--You're married, I Married the Wrong Person, I'll Just Get a Divorce, O.K., I'm Convinced--Let's Start Over, It's Courting Time, Sex Is Not a Four-Letter Word, and Love Is a Baked Sweet Potato. From Oliver (Thomas) Nelson Publishers in 1990, this 256-page book sold for $16.95 (hard).

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Devotions for the Engaged Couple by Harold Ivan Smith. (See under title More than I Do).

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Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye by Carolyn MCCulley. Through personal anecdotes and careful examination of Scripture, the author challenges single women to regard their singleness not as a burden, but as a gift from God that allows them to perform a unique role in the body of Christ. She gives them a map to help them discover God’s purpose, mission, and calling for their lives.
    Some of the issues discussed in the 13 chapters include:  Why the Bible calls singleness a gift and for what purpose, God is still working when nothing seems to be happening, The priceless worth of a virtuous woman, Why guarding your heart before marriage matters, Observing and serving the men around you, Investing in the next generation, and Having a heart for the home and hospitality when you’re often gone.
    From Crossway Books (div. of Good News Publishers, Wheaton, IL) in 2004, this 224-page book sold for $12.99 (trade).

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Divorce and Remarriage in the Church by Stanley A. Ellisen. Ellisen shows that the Bible has the answer to all marital problems in terms of God's love and discipline. Ellisen is professor of Biblical Literature at Western Conservative Baptist Theological Seminary in Portland, Oregon. The chapters deal with the purpose of marriage, broken marriage (if the other partner is "beyond reconciliation," i.e., remarried, remarriage is OK), and Christian service after divorce.
    Published in 1977 by Zondervan, this 105 page book sold for $2.95 (trade).

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Divorce and Remarriage in the Church by David Instone-Brewer. From IVP Books (division of InterVarsity Press, Downers Grove, IL) in 2006. See under DIVORCE.

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Ex-Wives and Ex-Lives: Survival Guide for the Next Wife by Paula J. Egner. The author confronts the realities of remarriage, as perceived by the next wife (that is, any woman who marries a man who has been married before). With candor and tongue-in-check, she delves into the murky waters of step-mothering, navigates the treacherous terrain of reluctant in-laws, and warns about tripping in the footsteps of the woman who came before. Ultimately, she leads next wives to the epiphany that being the first wife isn’t nearly as important of being the LAST wife!

   Some of the ten chapter titles include: Next Up, Signs of the Times, Picture This!, The Name Game, Help Me! I’m Living Another Woman’s Life, Coming Out, RATS! Remarriage Ain't the Same, and First at Last.

   From Aptly Spoken Enterprises (Jackson, TN) in 2004, this 121-page book sold for $10.95 (trade cover).

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First Comes Love, Then What? by Kimberly Beair. This book is for anyone desiring a positive marital relationship. The author says that finding the right mate doesn't usually happy by chance or luck, you need to know and employ certain principles to guide you in the right selection of a lasting relationship. This book will teach you a lot about yourself as well as what to look for and avoid in a marriage. It will also deal with some common misconceptions and unrealistic expectations about marriage and offer sound, practical advice on how to avoid broken hearts and broken marriages.
    Some of the ten chapter titles are: Challenging Your Assumptions, Know Thyself, I'm Still Interested---Now What?, Dealing with Problem Areas, Recognizing the Red Flags, Getting to “I Do,” Conflict and Communication and Making the Most of Every Stage. Each chapter concludes with a set of questions to help you reflect on that chapter's content and relate it to your own personal dating relationships.The author also sprinkles around lots of appropriate quotes or “words of wisdom” to further stimulate your thoughts on the content of that chapter.
    From Tyndale House (Carol Stream, IL) in 2008, this 174-page book sold for $13.99 (trade cover).

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Generation NeXt Marriage: the Couple's Guide to Keeping it Together by Tricia Goyer. This is a book for all who are married, plan to get married or counsel with married couples. It is well researched and offers real help and insightful truths into how a couple can have a lasting and loving marriage. The advice is biblical, often humorous and always practical as it deals with issues about kids, sex, money and dirty laundry.
    Some of the 19 chapter titles include: Dealing with Unrealistic Expectations, Revisiting Your Relationship Role Models, Committed for Life, Finding Balance, Everyday Stuff of Life, Church Service, Romancing Your Spouse, Different by Design, Conflict Resolution, Lovemaking, Money Matters and Growing in God. The book concludes with a Digging Deeper section which lists chapter by chapter discussion questions with Scripture references that couples and counselors may use to “dig deeper” into the issues.
    Published in 2007 by Multnomah Books (Colorado Springs, CO), this 257-page book sold for $14.95 (trade cover).

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Get Married by Candice Watters. This book is aptly subtitled, What Women Can Do To Help It Happen. It is the story of how one woman bought into her professor's philosophy of becoming pro-active in pursueing her dream of getting married. It worked. In her book she advises to live “like you're planning to marry.” This is done by esteeming marriage, encouraging men, and embracing a Christian community to help you reach your goal. In short, she demonstrates that if you wish to get married, there are things you can do to help it happen.
    Some of the nine chapter titles are Believe Marriage Is a Worthwhile and Holy Pursuit, God's Still in the Business of Making Good Matches, You Need a Network, Pulling a Ruth, Praying Boldly, and Living Like You're Planning to Marry. In her appendix she provides some thoughtful answers to some hard questions about relationships and marriage.
    From Moody Publishers (Chicago)  in 2008, this 196-page book sold for $12.99 (trade cover).

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Getting Married Again by Bob W. Brown, is a Christian guide for successful remarriage. The author discussed divorce and remarriage--two of the most important decisions that a person can make. Written to help the person in this situation and those who want to understand, particularly counselors. Covered are such subjects as: how to handle the hassle and guilt feelings of divorce and remarriage, children, finances, new lifestyle, religion.
    Published by Word Books, this 138 page book sold for $6.95 (hard).

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Getting Ready for Marriage by David R. Mace. Mace says in his preface that what he has done "in these pages is to offer my readers...exactly the program of marriage preparation which I would go through with them if they came to me professionally."
    Some of the topics discussed are: The Case for Marriage Preparation, Marriage as It is Today, How Well Do You Know Yourself?, How to Live with Sex, What are Your Goals and Plans.
    For those couples who need more help than what can be provided in the pages of this book, the author provides various referral agencies and resources to those who need direct help.
    Published by Abingdon, this 1985 revised edition contains 127 pages and sold for $5.95 (pb).

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Getting Ready for a Lifetime of Love by C. Michael Smith. This book is a culmination of the author's extensive premarital counseling experience as an associate pastor. He's identified questions and issues that build a common understanding of a healthy marriage, alongside god's intention for the relationship.
    The book is divided into six sessions (some with two parts) with each covering a particular aspect of marriage and includes Scriptural references, discussion questions, an overview of potential trouble spots and additional references for study and consideration. Some of the session titles are:  The Biblical Perspective of Marriage, Your Hopes and Expectations of Marriage, Filling Your Spouse's Emotional Tank, Communication: The Key to Oneness, Forgiveness and Conflict Resolution, Finances, Sexual Intimacy, The Wedding Ceremony and Growing Spiritually in Marriage.
    From Broadman & Holman Publishers in 1999, this 124-page workbook sold for $14.99 (trade).

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Getting Ready for Marriage Workbook by Jerry D. Hardin and Dianne C. Sloan. This book was created from a Christian perspective to help couples look seriously at their decision to marry. The time to talk about beliefs and expectations is before the wedding. The book helps couples expand their communication with each other on these and other subjects and to understand the commitment and covenant of marriage.
    Some of the ten chapter titles are: Loving You, Knowing You, Knowing Your Family, Communication, Attitudes, Resolving Conflicts, Religious Orientation, Money Matters, Sexual Relationship, and Family Panning & Children. Most all of the chapters have worksheets and discussion questions to spark dialog on those topics. Also, many of the chapters conclude with covenants, based on the chapter's material, which the couple can sign as they make certain commitments to each other related to that topic.
    Published in 1992 by Thomas Nelson, Inc., this 252-page workbook sold for $14.95 (trade).

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Getting Serious about Getting Married by Debbie Maken. The author proposes that marriage is the fundamental design and structure for life that God choose for his people. She argues that the church needs to reemphasize the importance of the gift of marriage. This book issues a challenge to churches in their teaching and attitudes toward singleness and to believers in their understanding of God’s intentions regarding marriage.
    Some of the 14 chapters include: What the Bible Says About Being Single, Historical Views on Marriage and Singleness, “Wait on the Lord,” “Jesus Is All You Need,” A Few More “Easy” Answers, Saying No to the Dating Game, and Inspiring Men to Biblical Manhood. The book concludes with a set of questions for use in private reading or group discussions.
    From Crossway Books (div. of Good News Publishers, Wheaton, IL) in 2006, this 207-page book sold for $12.99 (trade).

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Going All the Way: Preparing for a Marriage that Goes the Distance by Craig Groeschel. In this book the author says that he will show you that your desire for life-long intimacy is a God-given desire and he's going to help you prepare for that relationship. This book will guide you through the choices and commitments you need to make now in order to build a strong and vibrant relationship that will last. In a world where going all the way means putting yourself first, the author will show you how, by putting God first, you can build a soul-enriching, lifelong relationship. With his wit and candor he tackles such topics as sex, purity of heart, integrity and forgivess as he offers fresh advice and time-tested biblical principles on how to develop good relational skills long before the marriage.
    Some of the 15 chapter titles include: Finding the One, The Friendship Foundation, Sexual Mythology, The Problem with Playing House, Passion and Pursuit, Pure Intimacy, and A Covenant for Life.
    Published in 2007 by Multnomah Book (Colorado Springs), this 212-page book sold for $19.99 (trade cover).

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Have Your Wedding Cake and Eat it Too! by Joey O'Connor. This book, as the author puts it, is for "nearly weds and newly weds" as he shares humorous stories and helpful insights about the ups and downs of married life. The book offers solid principles and practical suggestions to help your relationship move from "I do" to "till death do us part."
    Some of the 20 chapter titles include Get Extremely Married, Three Weddings and a Funeral, Opposite Families Do Attract, There's Somebody in My Bed, Marriage-Bed rules, Your Mother-in-Law's Guide to Marriage, This is Not What I Had in Mind, and The Big Move.
    From Word Publishing (Nashville) in 2000, this 208-page book sold for $12.99 (trade).

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Help for Remarried Couples and Families by Richard P. Olson and Carole Della Pia-Terry. In this book the authors, Olson being a pastor and Pia-Terry a family counselor, discuss many areas of concern: the affect of remarriage on the relationship of each person to the church and to God, the wide variety of remarriages and stepfamilies, ways for rebuilding one's self esteem after divorce or the death of one's spouse, the stages a person must experience before he or she is ready for remarriage, and the different types of courtship among formerly married men and women.
    This book is written for persons involved in a remarriage situation. There is also a companion volume, for church leaders working with remarried persons, entitled Ministry with Remarried Persons.
    Help sold for $9.95 and Ministry for $10.95. Both were 1984 releases from Judson Press (trade).

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Hi-Fidelity Marriage by J. Allan Petersen. The purpose for this 77-page pocket guidebook is to make a case for fidelity in marriage. The author points out how to be completely happy in a marriage and how to survive a sex-saturated society.
    The book's three chapters are: Could an Affair Happen to You? Test Your Temptation Quotient, and How to Affair-Proof your Marriage. It concludes with a Marriage Test for Wives and Husbands which should help them in forecasting the future of their marriage.
    From Tyndale House in 1986, $1.95 (trade).

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How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk by John Van Epp, Ph. D. In short, this is a workbook based on a tape series by the same title. The material presents a system for singles to use while sizing up potential mates. Its purpose is to help in one's own understanding of themselves, the people they date, and in "the mysterious forces which create the thing we call Love." Specifically, these tools outline the characteristics must be present and the ones that must be avoided in choosing a mate. As the subtitle says, this is "The way to follow your heart without losing your mind."      The material contains five sections: Knowledge, Trust, Reliance, Commitment and Sex. In addition to these broad topics, some of the more specific topics discussed include: family background, the compatibility potential, relationship skills, past relationship patterns, ideal and real image, internal malfunctions, the marital selection process and sex/romance in marriage. The workbook serves two purposes: 1. it gives the outline of the tape series and 2. its many reflective questions are designed to help the reader to personalize the material.       The material was produced by John Van Epp of Lifechangers (330-321-3527) in 1999. It is available in both video and cassette tape formats of five tapes each with an easy-to-follow accompanying (8.5x11) workbook. The video series sold for $89.95 and the cassette series for $49.95. One free (Parents or Singles) workbook (43-pages) comes with each order; additional workbooks sold for $9.95.

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How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk by John Van Epp, Ph.D. This book is based on years of research on marital and premarital happiness and it will, as the jacket says, “maximize your potential of finding ‘the one’ by giving you the tools to focus on the crucial characteristics of a loving, lasting relationship.” This book will help you:  become healthy in love and make healthy love choices, identify your past mistakes and motivate you not to repeat them, awaken you to your own needs and life goals, change yourself—and change your relationships, use  your head as well as your heart in love, and more.     Some of the 13 chapter titles include: Follow Your Heart without Losing Your Mind, Find Your Soul Mate, Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say, Find Your Mate’s Soul, Sketching the Date-Mate Profile and If I Scratch Your Back, Will You Scratch Mine? Filled with charts and graphs, each chapter concludes with a Don’t Forget section which summarizes the key points of the chapter.        From McGraw Hill in 2006, this 326-page book solds for $22.95 (hardcover).

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How to Choose the Wrong Marriage Partner and Live Unhappily Ever After by Mason and Jacobs. (See under Dating, Love & Sex).
    How to Get Married...And Stay That Way by Cliff Allbritton. The author says that there are probably far more people trying to get into marriage than out of it. For that reason, he has written this book, to increase a person's chances of finding a mate.
    This is a "how-to" book. He tells singles how to: get a date with someone you really like, to avoid rejection, know if the person is the right one for marriage, make your marriage last, and put God in the center of your marriage.
    Some of the chapter titles include: What the World Needs Now, The Pursuit of Happiness, Is the Package Important?, Sizing Up the Inner Person, The Second Time Around, and Keeping the Train on Track.
    Released in 1982 by Broadman Press, the 144 page book sold for $4.95 (pb).

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How to Have A Good Marriage: Before and After the Wedding by Mark W. Lee, President of Simpson College in San Francisco. He draws from his extensive counseling experience to offer practical Christian guidance for those thinking of marriage, to long-marrieds, and even to singles who might learn how appropriate is their unmarried state.
    The main body of the book is fifty thought-provoking questions, pointing out potential marital problem situations, which are designed to reveal important information about prospective partners-for-life. Lee guides the reader in arriving at honest answers--answers that reveal the true self. Published by Christian Herald Books (1978) at $7.95 (hard).
    Loving Again by Joseph A. Ryan. (See under Dating, Love & Sex)

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I Promise You by Willard F. Harley, Jr., Ph.D. Subtitled, “preparing for a marriage that will last a lifetime,” this book offers couples four ways to create a healthy and vibrant marriage: care, protections, honesty, time. Each chapter contains useful and practical exercises to help readers make each of these four keys second nature in their relationships. Engaged couples will find this book an invaluable tool in evaluating and improving their relationships. Additionally, pastors and counselors will find this book an excellent source of information and advice. 
    Some of the 12 chapter titles are: The Most Important Emotional Needs, The Policy of Joint Agreement, Identifying and Overcoming Love Busters, Understanding Dishonesty, Scheduling Time for Undivided Attention and, For the Love of Your Life. Each chapters concludes with a “Talk about this” section of questions meant to stimulate discussion on the points of the chapter. The book also has a number of appendices including: Recreational Enjoyment Inventory, Emotional Needs Questionnaire, Love Busters Questionnaire, Personal History Questionnaire and a Time for Undivided Attention Worksheet.    
    Published in 2006 by Fleming H Revell (div. of Baker Publishing Group, Grand Rapids, MI), this 208-page book sold for $17.99 (hard back)

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I Thought for Sure I’d be Married by Now by Jeff Hidden. The author says that the single person’s journey to marriage has its own unique set of circumstances, especially when the person reaches a certain age. Their lives are often riddled with loneliness, worry, fear, frustration, anger, etc. But Hidden says that it doesn’t have to be that way and that this book will show singles some practical keys on how they can turn worry and frustration into a peace-filled journey in life.
    Some of the 20 chapter titles include: The Power of Thank-You Prayers, The Phone Call, The Valentine Blues, The Matchmakers, The Dating Game, How Do You Know If You Have Found the Right One?, Being in the Right Place at the Right Time, Passion and Purity, and I Thought for Sure I’d Never Be Single Again. The book concludes with 75 scriptural Thank You Prayers using 215 Bible verses that singles can use in their prayers.
    From ACW Press (Ozark, AL) in 2005, this 204-page book sold for $14.99 (trade cover).

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Living Together: Myths, Risks & Answers by Mike and Harriet McManus. This book helps couples see the myths and dangers of LTA's (Living Together Arrangements) before marriage and provides suggestions for moving them into healthy, rewarding, long-term marriages. The authors provide lots of valuable statistics to back up their conclusions that couples in LTA's are in high risk situations on several levels. In addition to providing help for couples in LTAs, the book is also a tool for church leaders, a guide for parents of cohabiting adult children, and a call to couples of successful marriages to mentor those couples wanting to marry.
    Some of the ten chapter titles include: Why Couples Live Together, Risks of Cohabitation, The Unpleasant Truth About Cohabitation, A Case for Marriage, The Church's Responsibility, The Right Way to Test a Relationship, Mentors and Mentoring, Teaching Relationship Skills and The Community Marriage Policy. The authors also include a Sample Community Marriage Policy and list 220 cities that have adopted the covenants.
    From Howard Books (div. of Simon & Schuster, NY) in 2008, this 234-page book sold for $19.99 (hard cover).

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Making a New Vow by Joseph Warren Kniskern. This book is, as the subtitle says, "A Christian's Guide to Remarriage." The author offers sound, biblical, and practical advice to help steer you through the many pitfalls and tough situations many couples face when making a new commitment.
    Some of the topics covered include: Seven Critical Stop Signs Regarding Prospective Remarriage Partners, Characteristics of Suitable Remarriage Partners, Building Trust, Four Essential Keys to a Successful Remarriage, Charting Out a Blended Family Plan, Six Warning Signs that a Blended Family Needs Help, Developing Intimacy in Remarriage, Blended Family Financial Issues, and Dealing with Ex-spouses and Ex-inlaws. Each chapter concludes with Questions for Personal Reflection.
    From Broadman & Holman Publishers (Nashville, TN), this 388-page book was published in 2003 and sold for $17.99 (trade cover).

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Making Your Marriage Work by Mary & Andrew Jensen. This is a book for those who were recently married or planning on being thus united. It is a collection of 20 open-ended stories which provide glimpses of married couples in moments of joy, fear, anger, frustration, sorrow, understanding, caring, and love. The authors talk about the problems of moving, in-laws, money, disease, and other true-to-life situations.
    The questions at the end of each chapter (story) serve as discussion starters for communication between partners who are interested in making their marriage work.
    From Augsburg in 1985, this 142 page book sold for $6.50 (pb).

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A Marriage Made in Heaven by Glenn Greenwood and Latayne C. Scott. The authors delve into the deeper meanings of biblical engagements, marriages, and wedding ceremonies and compare them to their counterparts in the church's marriage to Christ. This is a "how-to" book that shows how Christ did all the work on His marriage (to the church) and that believers need only to understand and enjoy this concept.
    The chapter titles are: The Mystery of Marriage, Marriage and Symbols, The Purpose of Marriage, The Selection of the Bride, The Betrothal, The Mohar, Two Gifts to the Bride, The Wedding Party, The Wedding Festivities, and Awaiting the Shout.
    From Word in 1990, this 83 page book sold for $7.99 (hard).

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Marriage & Divorce by J. Vernon McGee. See under Divorce. 

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Marriage Readiness by Bobbye & Britton Wood. David and Vera Mace, leaders in the Marriage Enrichment Movement, say the following about this book in the foreword: "What this book offers to its readers is a clear, understandable explanation of how to go about working for a truly successful marriage. The Woods have written in a style that is free, personal, and easy to understand. They are sharing with you, the readers, the knowledge that has enabled them to have an enriched and very happy marriage."
    Some of the chapter titles include: Myths About Marriage, How Do I Know This Is the One for Me?, Conflict: Friend or Enemy, Remarriage Readiness. The final chapter, A Checklist for Personal and Relational Readiness, consists of 21 questions for the couple to use and discuss as a way to start priority-building and goal-sharing.
    This 127 page book was published in 1983 by Broadman Press. It sold for $4.95 (pb).

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The Marriage You’ve Always Wanted by Dr. Gary Chapman. In this updated version of Toward a Growing Marriage, the author uses his expert wisdom and practical common sense to help couples with such questions as “Why won’t my spouse change?” “What does it really mean to love someone else?” How do I get him to listen to me?” and What if I’m the only one working at the marriage?” Whether you’re starting your life together or just need to improve communication in your marriage, this book will help move you toward “the marriage you’ve always wanted.”
    Some of the nine chapters are entitled, Why Do People Marry?, Why Won’t They Change?, What Love Really Means, Who Takes Care of What?” You Mean We Have to Work at Sex?” and Love and Money. Each chapter ends with a “Your Turn” set of reflections questions to encourage couples to reflect upon and discuss the ideas presented in that chapter.
    From Moody Publishers (Chicago) in 2005, this 158-page book sold for $13.99 (trade cover).

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Marrying Again: A Guide for Christians by Perry H. Biddle, Jr.. (See under Pastoral Care, Resources for Single Adult Ministry)

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Mates Don't Grow on Trees by Todd Landen. The subtitle says it all: "How to Meet the Man or Woman for You." And, according to the author, it has never been easier. In this humorous and helpful book, the author offers some time-tested techniques that will help you in finding that someone special. This book will help you hone your social skills, show you how to penetrate the singles market, master the art of mingling, and become adept at dating. Some of the 26 chapter titles include: Create Your Own Luck, Who is Mr/Mrs. Right?, The First Impression Factor, The Art of "Positioning," Finding Something in Common, The Party Phenomenon, This Dating Game, Time-Tested Phone Techniques, and Always Keep These Rules in Mind. Published by Dancing Hearts (1-800-444-2524) in 1996, this 197-page book sold for $14.95 (trade).

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Meditations for the Divorced by Judy Osgood. (See Meditations for the Widowed under Bereavement)

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Perfect Partners by Carolyn & Wes Huff. The subtitle says it all, "Make Your Hopes and Dreams for a Great Marriage Come True." The husband and wife authors advise that the best way to avoid divorce is to pick your partner well. They say that you won't have a happy marriage if you are mismatched from the start. To help with the matching process, this book provides 16 signposts to help the reader clearly define who's right for them and how to find that person.     Some of the ten chapter titles are: Why People Marry the Wrong Person, Get Your Head Straight, 16 Differences that Make a Difference, Market Yourself, Dating with a Purpose, Choosing to Fall in Love,  and Special Boundaries.       Published by Empowerment Solutions (Severna Park, MD),  in 1997, this 391-page book sold for $24.95 (hardback). Order from 1-800-247-6553

The above book has three Step-by-Step companion workbooks that are described to the right. All are priced at  $18.95 (tradecover).

Find Your Perfect Partner is a guide for singles that turns dating into action with a purpose rather than a romantic accident. (176 pages) When You hink You've Found Your Perfect Partnerguides singles to ask themselves five crucial questions taking the guesswork out of marrying the right person. (188 pages) Should You Stay or Should You Leave objectively guides couples in troubled marriages or long-term relationships through what may be their darkest hour. (238 pages)

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Preparing to Marry Again by Dick Dunn. With the divorce rate even higher for those who remarry, the author provides understanding and insight into the difficulties that most of these subsequent marriages face. He deals with a myriad of issues including past relationships, where to live, handling finances, prenuptial agreements, former spouses, dealing with the children, holidays, blending the different faiths and the wedding itself. The four chapter titles are: Being Ready, Practical Considerations, When There are Children, and The Wedding. Each chapter contains a series of questions designed to stimulate discussion between the readers. The book was designed to be used by couples themselves, pastors doing premarital counseling or in small groups focusing on marriage preparation. The Appendix is a Leader's Guide for Group Study.  From Discipleship Resources (Nashville, TN) in 1999, this 96-page book sold for $14.95 (trade).

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Read the Fine Print Before You Say "I Do" by Jack Leipert. This is a guide to marriage. In it the author, a marriage counselor and priest, asks the couples to set aside love and romance for a moment and take an eye-opening walk through the real world of married life. It then asks the couple to consider such hard questions as: are you both ready to face children, in-laws, money, sex, interfaith challenges, mid-life transitions, and spirituality issues with a fair amount of compromise on both sides?
    Some of the eleven chapter titles include: Getting to Know One Another, Who Picks up the Socks, Facing Sexuality in Marriage, Values and Money, Can Love Grow?, Sticking It Out, Spirituality, and Aging and Death. The discussion questions at the end of each chapter help the couple relate the chapter to their own situation.
    Published in 1994 by Paulist Press, this 83-page book sold for $5.95 (trade).

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Remarriage: A Healing Gift From God by Larry Richards. Richards, author of more than 40 books, combines a careful exposition of Scripture with real life case histories and shows how grace can operate in a divorced person's life.
    The author tackles the following topics on divorce and remarriage: Why was divorce permitted in the O.T.?, Why is divorce an "unforgivable sin" in some churches?, How to relate to divorced and remarried Christians, and more.
    The second part of the book deals with the author's investigation of various passages in the Gospels and the Epistles which deal with divorce and remarriage. Richard's book is surely to be considered one of the finest yet to be written on the subject of divorce and remarriage. His approach is one involving truth, grace and mercy.
    Published by Word Books in 1982, it sold for 7.95 (pb).

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Remarriage and God's Renewing Grace: A Positive Biblical Ethic For Divorced Christians by Dwight Harvey Small. This book is a study of biblical teaching as it concerns Christians now divorced and remarried, or facing this possibility. The author's approach develops around this thesis as explained in the book's introduction: The ruling ethic of the New Covenant is the forgiving, renewing grace of God in Christ. Whenever marriage failure is unresolvable--irreversibly so--then God's purpose, although never compromised, is mediated by grace. Renewing grace carries the possibility of positive new beginnings, not negative prohibitions. Thus, prohibitive legalism is ruled out by grace.
    The eight chapters are divided into the following three parts: 1. The Broader Biblical Understanding of Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage, 2. The Specific Biblical Teachings on Divorce and Remarriage, and 3. The Ruling New Testament Ethic of Grace Applied to Divorce and Remarriage.
    This 231 page book was published by Baker Book House in 1986 at $7.95 (trade).

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Remarriage in Midlife by Helen Hunter. This book is a handbook for those newly remarried or contemplating remarriage after forty. Couples are encouraged in their new commitment and told how to mold together both family's traditions and holidays, deal with the feelings of adult children, avoid problems over financial arrangements, and deal with death and illness. The author contends that marriage can work the second time around and offers a plan for success.
    Some of the 14 chapter titles are: Help from the Top, From Wreckage to Renewal, Marrying the Multitudes, Step Relationships, Handling Hurts, Holidays, Parenting our Parents, and Dream a New Dream.
    From Baker Book House in 1991, this 206-page book sold for $9.95 (trade).

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Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts by Dr. Les Parrott III and Dr. Leslie Parrott. Subtitled, "Seven Questions to Ask Before (and After) You Marry, this book is more than a book--it's practically a premarital counseling session. It deals with some of the thorniest spots in establishing a relationship, how to uncover and deal with problems before they emerge, how to communicate not just talk, and the importance of becoming 'soul mates,' a couple committed to growing together spiritually.
    All of the seven chapter titles are actually questions: Have You Faced the Myths of Marriage with Honesty?, Can You Identify Your Love Style?, Have You Developed the Habit of Happiness?, Can You Say What You Mean and Understand What You Hear?, Have Your Bridged the Gap?, do You Know How to Fight a Good Fight?, and Are You and Your Partner Soul Mates? The questions at the end of every chapter help to explore each topic personally.
    Published in 1995 by Zondervan, this 158-page book sold for $14.99 (hard).

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Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott.  The purpose of this book is to help you face the unique challenges of remarriage. It is a comprehensive, guided approach to surmounting the thorny issues you will face as a couple and to making your second marriage healthy, satisfying, and enduring.
    The nine chapter titles are: Are You Ready to Get Married Again?, Have You Faced the Myths of Marriage with Honesty?,  Can You Identify Your Love Style?,  Have You Developed the Habit of Happiness?, Can You Say What You Mean and Understand What You Hear?, Have You Bridged the Gender Gap?, Do You Know How to Fight a Good Fight?, Do You Know How to Blend a Family?, and Are You and Your Partner Soul Mates? Each chapter ends with several discussion questions.
    From Zondervan Publishers (Grand Rapids, MI) in 2001, this 187-page book sold for $17.99 (hard cover).

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Second Marriage, The Promise and the Challenge by Darlene McRoberts. In this book the author draws from her own experience and talks about finances, professional counseling, the importance of humor, and many other issues. She tells how she came to grips with such questions as "Will my second marriage be better than the first one which didn't work." "What does the church say about marrying again," and "How will my remarriage affect my children."
    From the Augsburg Publishing House in 1978, it sold for $3.50 (trade).

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Should I Get Married by M. Blaine Smith. This is a very helpful book for all persons seeking guidelines in finding a marriage partner or struggling with the idea of making that lifelong commitment. The author draws from his own experience and his years of pastoral counseling with both singles and marrieds. He offers help in understanding how our responsibility and God's interrelate in the marriage decision process, the difference between healthy and unhealthy fears, which ideals you have for a partner that are reasonable and which are not, and how to deal with rejection and disappointment.
    The 22 chapters of the book are divided into five major sections: Setting Your Sights, God's Guidance and the Marriage Decision, Choosing a Spouse, Finding a Spouse, and Confronting the Fear of Commitment.
    From InterVarsity Press (Downer's Grove, IL) in 1990 and revised in 2000, this 204 page book sold for $11.95 (trade).

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Single Again: Survival Kit for the Divorced and Widowed by Stephen M. Miller (see under Bereavement)

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Single Again: Remarrying for the Right Reasons by Bud and Kathy Pearson. This is a book for those persons either in a remarriage situation or are thinking of remarriage. It should be a help for engaged couples to assess their potential mates and recognize major issues that inevitably surface in a second marriage. Written out of their own experience coupled with their counseling and seminar experiences, the Pearsons clear up some of the myths that many still believe about being single, married or divorced.
    Some of their chapter titles are: The 50-50 Proposition, Leaving Your Past in the Past, The Kids Are Excited Too, Everything Will Work Out Financially, Our Marriage Will Be the Greatest, and We'll Build Our Marriage on the Rock.
    Published in 1985 by Regal Books, this 133 page book sold for $5.95 (pb).

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The Spark by Jay and Laura Laffoon. As the subtitle says, this book is about “Igniting the Passion, Mystery, and Romance in Your Marriage." The husband-wife team of authors tackle the biggest obstacles to intimacy in marriage with an irresistible combination of humor and wisdom. Together they identify five facets that are vital to a healthy marriage. They share their own experiences as well as the stories gleaned from their survey of more than 2000 married couples.
    Some of the 12 chapter titles include: Social Intimacy, Mental Intimacy, Emotional Intimacy, Physical Intimacy, Spiritual Intimacy, Lose Yourself, Love Your Spouse and Lift the Marriage.The discussion questions at the end of each chapter help develop positive action steps to keep the flame burning.
    From Baker Books (Grand Rapids, MI) in 2008, this 185-page book sold for $12.99 (trade cover).

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Then Comes Marriage? By Rebecca Price Janney, As the subtitle says, this book is "A Cultural History of the American Family." The author, a Ph.D. author-historian, shows how the structure of the American family has changed drastically since our early settlers. She traces the changing mores and practices surrounding marriage and family life from colonial times until today. In doing this, she examines the oft-overlooked communities such as Native Americans, slaves, immigrants and others who have contributed to our nation's ongoing family drama.
    Some of the 18 chapter titles include: The English Colonies, For God and Gold, The Victorian Ideal, Extreme Makeovers, Of Bloomers and Revivalists, See the USA, Mutiny in the Bounty, What's Love Got to Do with It?, We Are Family and The Most Excellent Way.
    Released in 2010 by Moody Publishers (Chicago), this 259-page book sells for $14.99 (trade cover).

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To Love Again by Helen Kooiman Hosier. In this book the author takes a close and caring look at Christian divorce and remarriage and offers help for those journeying through both of these significant life passages. Much of her book is based upon responses to a survey she sent to divorced and remarried Christians. She also offers her own story--a true-life drama of divorce, depression, attempted suicide, and renewed purpose--as a compelling account of God's healing love.
    Her fourteen chapters are divided into two parts: the first part contains seven chapters that deal with Divorce, Remarriage, and the Church, and the second part has five chapters that deal with Divorce, Remarriage, and the Individual.
    Published in 1985 by Abingdon Press, this 192 page book sold for $5.95 (trade).

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To Have and to Hold by Sharon Yoder. According to the author, all women deeply desire to marry and to have someone to share the emotional and physical intimacies of life with. But, she asks, since love and marriage doesn't come to every woman, how does the aging woman cope with her desire to marry and the reality that she may never do so? In Yoder's pleasant and readable style, she opens her heart and draws from her own personal journey, as well as from stories of women in the Bible, to help answer that question. Her insights will be an encouragement to all single women how they can still find God's fulfillment and purpose in life by "enlarging their tent."  The 12 chapter titles include: When Are You Going to Get Married?, Alone and a Single Rib, For This Cause, Why in the World Are There Singles?, Shame Wears Fig Leaves, Embracing Femininity, Forsaken and Grieved, Enlarging Your Tent, The Heart of Friendship, Lady-in-Waiting, The Heart at Home and Wearing the Glass Slippers. From Faith Builders Resource Group (Guys Mills, PA) in 2012, this 272-page book sells for $12.99 (soft cover).

The Truth About Same-Sex Marriage by Erwin W. Lutgzer. The author, pastor of Moody Church, writes with the passion of a prophet and the heart of a pastor as he deals in a straightforward yet compassionate manner with one of the most controversial issues of the day. His purpose is "to encourage and equip God's people to defend marriage, giving reasons why it's definition should not be broadened to include same-sex marriage." While stressing that Christians should show compassion for the gay community, Lutgzer says that same-sex marriage is "the most damaging social experiment to ever be attempted in this country." Not only does he cite numerous scripture passages to bolster his point but he also quotes from various surveys, studies and authories in the field.
    The six chapter titles are The Church Must Speak, We Must Consult the Designer's Manual, We Must Remember the Children, We Must Resist the Pressure, We Must Act Now, and We Must Seek God.
    From Moody Publishers (Chicago) in 2010, this 140-page book sells for $7.99 (trade cover).

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Wait...He's Coming by Kimberley McConico, PhD. The focus and recurring theme of this book is to encourage single women of faith to be patient and trust God to bring them their future spouse. This book is for single women hoping to marry or remarry to assure them that, if they live holy and honorable lives, God will provide them a husband. While they are waiting, the women should be fully immersed in living for God and serving Him in the church. The author does not believe in dating around to try to find a husband but in staying busy serving God and trusting Him to bring a husband to her. The seven chapter titles are Standard Living for Singles; While You Wait; Get What You Want; Financial Prosperity; Distractions, Temptations and Counterfeits; Uncertainty and Doubt; and The Fireproof Formula. The first six chapters ends with some "takeaways" she calls Key Points to Remember. The final chapter concludes with a series of formulas that, if followed, "...you will be the woman God wants you to be until that time comes when He sends you the man of your dreams." From Xulon Press in 2010, this 123-page book sells for $11.99 (trade cover).

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What the Church is Doing for Divorced and Remarried Catholics by James Castelli. (See under Divorce and Separation)

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What to Do Until Love Finds You (see under Dating/Love/Sex)

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What Your Wedding Can Be by William J. Peters. This book is designed to be used by couples, at least one of whom is Roman Catholic, in planing with the celebrant their ceremony within or outside of the celebration of Mass.
    The first part deals with an explanation of the Catholic Churches' liturgical directives and stresses the importance of knowing the reasons behind these requirements. Equipped with this understanding, the couple then uses the easy-to-follow workbook in the second part to plan their ceremony.
    Revised edition published in 1986 by Abbey Press, this 135-page book sold for $4.50 (trade).

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When the Honeymoon's Over by David and Vera Mace. This book is subtitled, "Making the Most of Your First Year of Marriage" and is written by two of America's most widely respected marriage counselors who have authored other books in the field of Christian marriage.
    This book is specifically tailored for couples recently married or soon to be married or remarried. It offers solid, tested advice that can mean the difference between marital breakdown and a loving, enduring marriage.
    Some of the topics include: What Newlyweds Need to Know, Commitment to Mutual Growth and Change, Building a Companionship Marriage, Your First Year Together, Creative Use of Anger and Conflict, and Sex, Money, and In-laws.
    Published in 1988 by Abingdon Press, this 128 page book sold for $5.95 (trade).

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When You Are Getting Married by Ron DelBene is a 32-page booklet designed to be given to engaged couples during the pre-marital counseling sessions. It discusses such topics as communication, friendship, constructive conflict, managing the money, sex, parenthood decisions, and growing in love. Each chapter concludes with some discussion questions.
    Published in 1991 by Upper Room Books (UMC), the booklet sold for $2.95 (trade).

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Who Says Get Married? by Don Meredith. In this book the author, the president and founder of Christian Family Life, Inc., exhorts singles to find their completeness in God, to learn to build healthy, lasting relationships, and to get on with the business of living a purposeful life now.
    Some of the chapter titles are: Who says Get Married?, I'll Take That One, The Dating Game, Reality in Relationships, Free to be Purposeful, The Power to Live Victorious Lives, and A Single's Life Goals.
    This book is a 1981 release from Thomas Nelson, Inc. and sold for $4.95 (pb).

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Why Christian Marriages Are Breaking Up by Gerald L. Dahl. In this book the author describes the increase in divorces of Christian couples as "an epidemic." In fact, he writes, the church itself may be a contributing factor in such divorces. Evangelical churches in particular often encourage unreal expectations of marriage and, by placing too many demands on their members' time, can exert pressure on some already strained relationships.
    There are remedies for these problems, asserts Dahl. Based on his years of marriage counseling in a psychiatric clinic, he has developed techniques for mending seemingly hopeless marriages. Dahl bids his readers to keep this in mind: "Divorce is not a solution. It is simply an exchange of one set of problems for another." He then goes on to relate the practical solutions that have worked for his patients.
    Published by Thomas Nelson in 1983, it sold for $6.95 (hard).

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Will You Marry Me? by Jason R. Rich. This book is all about how you can "pop the question with romance and style." Whether this will be your first or fifth, this book will help you make the proposal process more exciting,  romantic and memorable. It is chock full of ideas and suggestions on everything from picking out the engagement ring to deciding on when to pop the question to what to do if you are turned down.
    Some of the 6 chapter titles are: Traditional and Romantic Proposal Ideas: Extravagant, Outrageous and Fun Proposal Ideas; Planning Your Proposal; and Your Life After Getting Engaged. There is a helpful Quick Reference Guide in the back that offers suggestions of various types of wedding and honeymoon services.
    From New Page (div. of Career Press, 1-800-CAREER-1) in 2003, this 223-page book sold for $13.99 (trade cover.)

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With This Ring: Promises to Keep by Joanna Weaver. In this book the author looked at the history and meaning behind the phrases of the wedding vows and the significance of the wedding ceremony itself. The author includes many inspiring stories and meaningful quotes that illustrate the deeper meaning behind each aspect of the wedding ceremony. A perfect book for anyone preparing to exchange vows, celebrating a marital milestone or simply wanting tor capture the beauty of the promises they share as husband and wife. This would also make for a great gift by the officiating clergy to the wedding couple.
    The 35 short chapters are divided into five parts: The Betrothal Pledge, The Ceremony, The Vows, The Tokens, and The Declaration. Each chapter includes space to record treasured memories, shared dreams and meaningful reflections.
    From WaterBrook Press (Colorado Springs) in 2008, this gift book sold for $12.99 (hardback).

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YOUR MARRIAGE, GOD'S MISSION: Discovering Your Spiritual Purpose Together by Clint and Penny A Bragg. This book is more of a workbook to help married couples work through the biblically-based concepts of each chapter. The ultimate goal is "to help you discover God's mission for your marriage and assist you in its development, growth, and ongoing assessment."  
    Some of the 20 chapter titles include: Marriage on a Mission, Taking Stock of What You've Got, Marching in Formation, Breaking Down Fear, Sharing Your Rations, Know Your Enemy and Patrolling Your Borders. Each chapter concludes with a prayer meant to be shared together along with some action steps for further discussion and reflection upon the chapter.
    Published in 2017 by Kregel Publications (Grand Rapids, MI), this 229-page book sells for $15.99 (trade)

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Your Marriage: Making It Work by Peg and Lee Rankin. This is a good book for those thinking of marriage, newly married or those who have been married for a while but want to keep their relationship fresh.
    Some of the nine chapter titles include: How Do You Choose, Learning to Communicate, Learning to Forgive, Establishing Roles and Responsibility, The Spice of Life, and Total Commitment. Each chapter concludes with a chart so the reader can rate himself on the points made in that chapter.
    This book contains 140 pages and was published in 1986 by Lion Publishing for $5.95 (trade).

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